choices

Gabby is already almost 5 months old, you guys.

She LOVES to jump.

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She loves to talk.

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Her expressions bring me constant joy.

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She sleeps through the night. Every night. Since she was 6 weeks old. {I can’t take any credit for that. Sure, I read 3/4 of the Babywise book, but I followed her cues. I wouldn’t even know how to start getting her to stick to a rigid eat/sleep schedule.}

She still sleeps in our room. We have a beautiful crib in the nursery which is about 10 feet from our room, which we put her to sleep in every night, only to pick her up and move her to the pack’n’play in our bedroom to spend the night. Yup, we are those parents.

She rolled over on Sunday!

I recently ordered one of these and it has made summer ten times more fun.

In other news, yesterday morning Gabs had to get some x-rays. A while back, I noticed she had an extra little roll of chub on her right leg and remembered that that’s the classic sign of hip dysplasia in infants. She doesn’t have any other symptoms that go along with that diagnosis, so we are hopeful that it’s just a little extra plumpness! If not, we will count our blessings that she’s healthy and happy and the worst thing that could happen would be 6 months of treatment. God is so good!

I was caught off guard yesterday morning though, when we went into the imaging room, the technician took great care to cover me with a lead apron to protect me from the radiation and make sure there was no possible way I was currently pregnant, as the radiation could be harmful to the fetus… but then Gabby was left completely uncovered! They needed images of her pelvis so obviously they couldn’t cover that with a protective apron, but I felt horrible that I was wearing protection and my little daughter was lying there completely exposed. All the nursing knowledge of risks of radiation at an early age were completely flooding my mind. Tears started to come, I felt overwhelmed at the choices- deny the -rays that we needed in case she needed treatment for her hip? Or expose her to radiation when her cells are brand new and growing? Oh gosh. Even typing this later makes me feel like an overprotective and over-sensitive mom. So many moms out there have kids with much more serious problems and here I am crying over one x-ray?

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Well, it was still tough. I did consent, after getting some thorough explanations on why an ultrasound wasn’t sufficient. And I prayed that God will still keep her little cells safe.

Every parent has those unexpected moments of ‘overwhelmed-ness’ and those feelings of ‘dang it, I should have looked this up before we came’. And I guess, part of being a parent is getting through those moments with a clear mind and weighing the risks and benefits while taming the part of your mind that will be fierce in protecting your child from any possible harm.

Yes, I know it was just one x-ray. Will she get cancer? Most likely not. But still. It made my heart hurt a little bit today.

My own momma made me some molasses cookies on Monday for this very occasion, I think! She must have known that cookies help soothe owwies.

~M

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